Mississippi Book Burning
Mississippi libraries are banning Jon Stewart's best-selling book, "America", from hitting its shelves, due to some of its racy content. Officials also announced that they will be dropping the traditional "Dewey Decimal System" for something that "sounds less dirty."
Thankfully, Mississippi libraries will still be stocking books that will be somewhat useful for locals, such as this handy guide on how to meet Mr. Right, tips on welcoming newcomers to the area, and the "Tolstoy of the South".
Immediately after the announcement, a library official excused himself to "eat his own crap."