Oi! You're Goin to F***in' Pay! Rah Rah.

It is a sad day here at You Can't Make It Up, as my perfect man has been killed in a cross bow incident. I will reprint exerpts of this article, and you will understand why my passion runs deep:

Crown tells of crossbow shot
27 May 2005

A fatally injured man pulled a crossbow arrow out of his torso and taunted the man who shot him, saying: "Is that all you've f... got?"

Soon afterwards, Anton Nauer collapsed and within hours he was dead from being shot by Dean Pender in a late-night confrontation at Pender's Christchurch home.

Prosecutor Kerryn Beaton said Nauer, McDougall and Little had arrived at Pender's home in Wainoni about 3am on Sunday, December 19.

During the previous evening there had been a series of incidents, including a window being smashed at the home of Pender's former girlfriend, leading to the trio allegedly arming themselves with num-chukkas and a knife.

"The allegation is that Nauer proceeded onto the property, bearing a set of num-chukkas, and there was an altercation with Pender, who obtained a crossbow and fired a fatal shot at Nauer," Beaton said.

"They said, `Do you know where Dean Pender is? Get him here'. They said he'd smashed Natasha's window," she said.

They yelled out: 'Oi, Pender, you're going to effing pay. Rah, rah.'

"The guy pulled out num-chukkas and started swinging them around and started getting really aggressive. By this time Dean was down the driveway and they all saw him and started yelling, 'You're going to f... pay.'

"They started running towards Dean and the guy was swinging the num-chukkas. I got pushed to the ground by the Maori guy with (McDougall) right behind me.

"They were yelling 'You're going to f... pay, Pender. We're going to get you.' (Nauer) said `We're going to f... kill you.' McDougall had a knife in his hand. It was like a hunting knife.

"I was freaking out. It all happened so fast – they were running towards Dean and I got pushed to the ground. I was getting off the ground when it happened. Dean said 'Get back or I'll f... shoot. Get back. Get back.' That's the only time I heard him yelling.

"Then the Maori guy was pulling out the crossbow (arrow from his torso). As he was pulling it out, he said 'Is that all you've f... got?' He handed it to Shaun then he and the two European guys (McDougall and Little) started taking off up the driveway."

This has to be one of the most INTENSE fucking fights I have ever read about! Who do these guys think they are, Q Tarantino? To pull a CROSSBOW out of your chest and scream "Is that all you fuckin got?!"

Sometimes in New York, you begin to miss blatant masculinity. So hard to come by these days. This might be my favorite thing ever.


Actually, this might.


No, definitely this.

With thanks to the other most masculine person I know, Eli Liedman, for the scoop. (And yes, he really is a steel worker.)