If only he was! EVERYONE REJOICE: Craig Kilborn is leaving the Late Late Show!!
Seriously, I'd rather sit through a Clockwork Orange-style Tom Snyder Marathon then have to watch this dickwad mug for the camera with that huge, shiny, cocky face of his.
(This hatred of mine might stem back to a Daily Show taping a few years back, where a post-show "meet and greet" went horribly wrong: Kilborn was shaking the hands of audience members, while ogling some 13-year-old whores in the back row. As if my ego weren't already shattered, he then offered me a hand that was so clammy, so limp, that I think I can officially say I know what it's like to shake the cold, dead dick of Walt Disney.)
ATTENTION CBS: If you're looking for someone who's got the goods to get your little CSI/Survivor/AmazingRace Ass into the Top Ten, look no further:
(me quickly putting on jazz pants, vest and top hat) TAAAA-DAAAA!
Anyone want to start a letter writing campaign with me?