Queen Elizaballs

God bless the military man who was lucky enough to sit next to the Queen in his official Battalion's photo. There he is, exposing his choch-n-balls (as Sandler used to say), while the Queen exposes her famous "cuntface". The two compliment each other nicely.

At least British soldiers know how to have a little fun!! (Without all that "Abu Ghraib" business... awkward collar pull.) Maybe Bush should issue another Elton John-esque "mandate" by putting our "boys" overseas in skirts. On second thought, this would probably break some sort of "Don't Ask, Don't Fellate" policy.

In other snooze, I caught the last hour of Sir Richard Branson's "Rebel Billionaire" last night, and was surprised at how boring it was. Surprised because one of the contestants, Steve, went to high school with me, and even STILL I was tempted to shoehorn my eyes out. Steve is the 23 year old tennis playing "business owner." Back in the day, he was shooting to be the next Sampras, but I guess now reality show has set in.

Side Memo to America: I'm up on all the high school gossip, and I ain't never heard anybody tell me that he has his own business. Someone get The Smoking Gun on this, stat.

Even Branson's elderly hotness can't save "Rebel's" lameness. And after two hours, what do we get? Some sort of ritualistic booting off ceremony?? NO! Some IDIOT decides that travelling all over the world on a private jet, the whole "once in a lifetime chance" thing, wasn't really her bag, and quits.

I wasn't planning on rooting for Steve, but after seeing the other Massengil's he's up against, I now have no choice. So, for you Steve, here is a picture of some sort of gospel-singing, trumpet-playing band made up of child-pig hybrids.



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