In Shock

The Daily News totally stole one of my best jokes.



I am in total shock. And with the kind of day I'm having, i.e., a terrible one.

For the record, my joke goes as follows:

"Do you think if somebody blew up the Mayor, the New York Post headline would read... Kabloomberg?"

OK, maybe not one of my best jokes, but always good for a laugh. Just so you know, if tomorrow the post "jokes" about a new special on TLC called "The Little Girl With The Inside Out Vagina Hands", you'll know who to blame/thank.

p.s. Does anyone have suggestions for methods to relax when the lonely, older, brainless, bitter, unattractive woman who has your job but thinks she's your boss speaks to you like a piece of garbage? I've tried "breathing slowly" and "softly weeping on the phone with mother", but neither did the trick. Did someone say "Get a new job?" Good idea! E-mail me with any leads. Add to my list of hobbies "Failing to stand up for myself or have any dignity."

On second thought, I know what will help me relax: Playing with my Goth Metal Band, "Star Jones' Chin Hair."