Monday, November 01, 2004

Halloween and Be Seen

Well, one weekend, an overpriced wig, and 2,198 "fun-size" Musketeers later, and Halloween was a huge, bloated success.

My first mistake was waiting until the last minute to purchase my costume. I was going to go to my friend's party dressed as "Daylight Savings Time". But when I went to Ricky's, every drag queen's favorite clothier, to get some wacky Halloween accoutrements, I was met with a yuge line outside (read: it was 5:30 p.m. on the Saturday night most people were partying on.) So when I went in, I just began blindly grabbing things Supermarket Sweep style (minus the besweatered love of my life David Ruprecht).

"Daylight Savings Time" was to consist of a small (but thankfully overpriced) blue wig I purchased, then stapling coupons to a shirt, and wearing a huge clock around my neck, like Flava Flav of Surreal Life fame. The effect of the costume was either "Daylight Savings Time" or "Covetous Jew in a Hurry" (not too far from my everyday uniform, actually.)

But when I had completed my makeup and affixed the tiny wig to my enormous head, my roommate said that I looked like a "Flight Attendant from the Future." And I said "That is it!"

Of course, I had little time to actually research what a flight attendant from the future would look like, but I assume said flight attendant would be a raging slut. And you know what they say about people who assume things: They accept things without validation out of u and me.

So, I slapped on a short skirt, fishnets, some boots and a black suit jacket, affixed a flight pin (that I made in under 2 minutes) to my lapel, recombed my wig, and was ready to fly!

Here's an example of a conversation I seemed to be repeating all night:

Someone: What are you?
Michelle: I'm a.....? (pointing to flight pin)....?
Someone: Stewardess?
Michelle: Yes! I'm a stewardess from the....? (pointing to wig)...?
Someone: The airport?
Michelle: The future! Ask me what airline I work for.
Someone: What?
Michelle: Whoever Smelt It, Delta!
Someone: (walks away from me.)

Here is a picture. This wig was tiiiiny, and did not offer the usual hair coverage that I expect out of my wigs. Nevertheless:

On another note:

Tonight is our Official Votergasm Party here in NYC. Here's the e-mail I sent out:

Dear Em.Eff.'s,

Tomorrow is a revolutionary time for election night sex parties. (the world's first youth movement encouraging voters to
have sex with another voter on election night and withhold sex from all
non-voters) will be having their Official New York City Flagship Party
right here in (uncomfortable pause) New York City.

The sexiness will commence at PM Lounge where the city's hottest and
most patriotic youth will consort and cavort in its steamy faux-Haitian
setting at around 7 pm.

There'll be large TVs set up on either side of the club, and drink
specials til 10.

PM Lounge
50 Gansevoort Street
Take the 1/2/3/9 to 14th St. and walk west.

See you tomorrow.

Michelle Collins
Director and Spokeswoman

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