Thursday, June 08, 2006

More Like Blogrrrrr

Blogger has been down and giving me problems. I have not abandoned you. I have not given up.

While I figure out what to do with my time, you should be reading these two articles from this week's amazing issue of Rolling Stone.

This piece about Merv Griffin gets an A+ in Hysteri 101. What a jolly, fat, super-hard-core-conservative hilarious vaudevillian gay! That is, until he says some shit about the Jews. That's when I crossed him off my "5 People I Want to Meet in Heaven" list, and reinstated Jack Palance. And all I kept thinking when I read this was: OMG, did Ryan Seacrest give him a BJ? Probs. Nay. Def.

Dear Mister Fantasy by John Colapinto

Once done with that, change gears a little, and check out this piece about allllllllllll of the thousands of sluts and man-whores currently attending Duke U. The article pretends for 5 seconds to care about the Duke Lacrosse (or "Laxers") rape scandal, but really it just wants to talk about girls in a baby oil wrestling match. Frankly, when first hearing about the rape case I sided with the guys... but this piece reads lke a draft of "Caligula", making me doubt anything I've ever known. An enjoyable read, as you feel superior to these morons (because you yourself have little to no self-confidence), until you realize they will be making much, much more money than you in T minus 5 minu --- oh wait -- they're ALREADY richer. Fuck.

Sex Scandal at Duke by Janet Reitman

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