Friday, August 27, 2004

Olympic Ads and Subtracts

It was reported this morning that General Motors has pulled its "Jack Flash" Corvette commercial off of the airwaves. The commercial, directed by uber-biquitous Guy Ritchie, features a kid having a dream sequence where he races his lil' red Corvette like a blind Al Pacino hoo-ahhing his way through the streets of New York with wreck-less abandon. It was fast, it was fun, and, frankly, I'm furious.

Note to consumer groups: If you really want to do a service for "children" (read: me), how about forcing McDonald's to pull those low-budget Ronald McDonald ads featuring the bloodthirsty clown taking part in Track and Field events and diving into a pool... I mean, a clown in a bathing cap? I'd rather see him shave his geisha-like testicles using a razor blade and dry rub. My nightmares haven't been this inspired since Carrot Top's "Die Down the Middle" campaign.

Really, these "consumers advocates" should let kids know that people who look like Ol' Ron Micky-D will almost certainly touch their bathing suit areas. Kids stealing cars? That just makes for adorable movie fodder.

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